#LOVEDAY | July 10
May 25, 2021

Help! I’ve Got Trust Issues

We’ve all experienced hurt, betrayal, and brokenness in our relationships. Unresolved hurt almost always leads to trust issues. So, how do we love like we’ve never been hurt?

In this episode of Life In Motion, Heather and Jamie share their current and past struggles with trust issues and what they’re doing about them.

3 Ways to Love Like You’ve Never Been Hurt:

Being offended is one of the biggest roadblocks we have in relationships. So many of us walk around with hurt and anger that keeps us from having productive conversations. So let’s figure out how to resolve our trust issues and love well.

  1. Pray about your trust issues

    If you’re in a situation where you’re deeply hurt, saying, “I forgive you,” isn’t the first step. The first step is saying, “Lord, heal me.” Start with prayer. Genuinely seek God. Ask Him to search your heart and help you surrender your hurt to Him. Then, when He leads you, pursue forgiveness.

     

  2. Clarify expectations to diffuse trust issues

Knowing and communicating your expectations will help minimize tension in your life and resolve trust issues. There are so many areas where unspoken expectations go unmet. And as a result, we become offended. So figuring out your expectations before you go into a situation is crucial to navigating your relationships well.

What expectations are you putting on the people in your life that you’ve never communicated? Remember: your expectations will change over time. So you will need to reevaluate and re-express continually.

 

  1. Figure out your script and share it

Your internal script may be reinforcing your trust issues more than you think. We all have internal scripts that we aren’t acutely aware of until somebody bumps into them, but we’re offended as soon as they do. We think we’re not ___ enough (insert smart, funny, nice, exciting, etc.) or we’re too ___ (loud, bossy, optimistic). And although we can usually talk ourselves out of believing these things about ourselves, when someone unintentionally reinforces our internal script, we crumble.

When you’re hurting, examine your thoughts and identify how your internal script was reinforced, revised, or rewritten by this scenario? Then, choose to believe the best about the individual your communicating with and be honest about your internal script.

Domestic Violence Crisis Lines

In this episode, we are addressing nonviolent and non-psychologically damaging trust issues. We have listeners from all different walks of life and because of that, we want to be clear. If you’re in a dangerous or abusive situation, you need to get safe first and foremost. Please use the resources below for help.

DVIS – Domestic Violence Intervention Services, Inc.
Rebuilding lives affected by domestic violence and sexual assault through advocacy, shelter, counseling, and education.

Contact: 918-743-5763 | 24-hrs
4300 S. Harvard Ave., Ste. 100
Tulsa, OK 74135

Family Safety Center
Services include emergency protective orders for domestic violence and verbal abuse; provides help and resources to children exposed to domestic violence; offers legal support.

Contact: 918-742-7480 | 24-hrs
600 Civic Center Ste. 103, Main Floor
Tulsa, OK 74103

Oklahoma Safeline
Provides safety tips to assist with abusive relationships, domestic violence, sexual assault, and stalking.

Contact: 1-800-522-7233 | 24-hrs
2460 NW 39th St.
Oklahoma City, OK 73112

Additional resources:

Pete Scazzero podcast
Have trust issues with the church? Read more.

 

Check out episode one of this season!

Listen Here > >
@churchonthemove