March 15, 2021

Counseling: What To Expect and When To Go

WAIT … DO I REALLY NEED TO SEE SOMEONE? 

Okay, so maybe you’ve had the thought, “Should I go to counseling?” But quickly shrugged it off with a “Nahhhh, I already know all my issues. I don’t need someone else to know them.” Or maybe you’ve already made an appointment, but you’re nervous about what to expect. Like, what if you see someone there! 

In this episode of Life In Motion, Heather George and Jamie Jobe talk about what to expect and when to go to counseling. They even talk about helping their children go to counseling and allowing them to confide in someone other than a parent. Listen to the episode! 

“SOMEONE LOOKS AT YOU, LISTENS TO YOU, DOES NOT JUDGE YOU, AND ASKS YOU QUESTIONS THAT REALLY HELP.” 

If you’ve been hesitant about going to counseling, here’s some encouragement for you. There is great relief in being able to share what’s on your heart and mind without judgment and fear. To put it simply, counseling is a safe environment where someone with an outside perspective looks at you, listens to you, does not judge you, and asks you questions that really help. AND they’re professionals, so they have the tools to help you strategize how best to unravel the different parts of your story to find relief from the tensions you’re feeling. 

When should you go to counseling?

Sometimes you might wonder … When is it appropriate to see a counselor? We would answer that by saying, “WHEN IS IT NOT?” Whether big or small, if you’re dealing with something, it’s appropriate to see a counselor about it. Here are 5 signs to look for when considering if it’s time to see a counselor:

1. Circling the same problem or argument over and over again.
2. Struggling with confidence, joy, anxiety, depression, or overspending.
3. A rocky relationship with anyone in your life, including coworkers, parents, kids, etc.
4. You’ve noticed a bad habit from your parents creeping up in you.
5. You feel a lingering sadness, anger, or numbness.

If you are in a profession that requires you to care for others or carry a weight of responsibility, we urge you to see a counselor several times throughout the year to process what you are carrying at work.

Why can’t you just “LET IT GO” without going to counseling? 

Dealing with the difficulties in life is … Well, difficult. Like most things, you can’t let go of the past, present, and even future issues on your own. The lie of our lives is that you can do it yourself, but the truth is, you can’t. Life is lived in relationship with others and if you’re not processing life with people, you’re probably punishing people and don’t even know it. You can’t just let it go because you don’t know how and no Google search will tell you how. It is something that must be discovered in relationships with others. That’s the beauty of counseling, someone who has the tools to help you let it go, looks at your life with you, and guides you through a personal, custom practice of letting it go. 

5 Pro tips:

So you’re ready to see a counselor? Here are few quick pro tips for you: 

1. 1. Remember, change takes time.
      Plan to see your counselor multiple times. They will typically suggest how many sessions they recommend during your first meeting. You may see someone a few times and uncover something.
   2. On the subject of time, try to book all your appointments at once.
      We promise you will go to about three sessions, get busy super busy and then forget to schedule an appointment for 3 months.
   3. Create space in your schedule on the day of your first meeting.
      If you can, try to create some time after your first meeting just to sit and process before going back to work or heading home.
   4. Tell someone you’re ready to see a counselor.
      For whatever reason, you will likely decide it’s time to see a counselor and then never make the phone call to set up an appointment. Tell a friend and ask them to make sure you make the call. Don’t keep waiting for the next time you’re struggling; just go.
   5. Bring a journal or a notepad with you.
      Your counselor will likely have some exercises for you to do in between meetings that you’ll want to remember. Or they may use some specific words that help unlock an idea for you. Bring a journal to quickly jot down the things you don’t want to forget about your visit.

It’s okay if you don’t connect with the first counselor you meet with. You may consider meeting with someone once or twice before deciding if you want to meet with them for all of your recommended sessions.

Tulsa area counseling recommendations: 

Cornerstone Christian Counseling 
Hope Forward Counseling & Coaching
Joy Christian Counseling
COPES
Suicide Hotline

Read more from Life In Motion.